15
Mar
2010
Da Smooth Criminal Bar Room
Step Right up and Grab a Drink Before You Get Your Hit. Don’t see what you want? You can look at all the drinks on the menu individually — just click on the picture!
[itk-eticker]INTRODUCING THE dirty, Dirty, DIRTY DIANA![/itk-eticker]
Have an Idea for a new drink? Please leave a comment and we’ll see about putting it on the menu!!!!
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A Wet Sabah: Creamy Sabah w/ just a hint of Michael in her.
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MJ
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Bad Boy Shot
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Ms. Chastity
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Chocolate Mike
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Liquid CobraCrack™
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Creamy Mike
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Creamy Mike w/ Strawberry Sabah’s Fave
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Creamy Mike w/ Chocolate – Sabah loves it!
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Creamy Orgasm (Mikegasm +Creamy Mike)
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Dirty Dirty Dirty Diana
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DDD, also served by the bottle
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Golden Boy – Lil Mike mixes/stirs
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Holoma’s Soup
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Holoma’s Soup
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L.O.V.E. Shot
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Mahba Mike + Sabah, a Perfect Combo
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Mikegasm
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Minty Mike
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Mr. M & Mrs. M
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Prince Michael’s Unleashed
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Prince Michael’s Unleashed
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Prince Royale
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Prince Michael’s Pure
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Sangre
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The Force
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The Foreplay
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The Gentleman
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The Thriller
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Thug Passion
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- A Wet Sabah: Creamy Sabah w/ just a hint of Michael in her.
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- MJ
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- Bad Boy Shot
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- Ms. Chastity
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- Chocolate Mike
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- Liquid CobraCrack™
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- Creamy Mike
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- Creamy Mike w/ Strawberry Sabah’s Fave
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- Creamy Mike w/ Chocolate – Sabah loves it!
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- Creamy Orgasm (Mikegasm +Creamy Mike)
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- Dirty Dirty Dirty Diana
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- DDD, also served by the bottle
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- Golden Boy – Lil Mike mixes/stirs
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- Holoma’s Soup
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- Holoma’s Soup
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- L.O.V.E. Shot
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- Mahba Mike + Sabah, a Perfect Combo
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- Mikegasm
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- Minty Mike
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- Mr. M & Mrs. M
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- Prince Michael’s Unleashed
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- Prince Michael’s Unleashed
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- Prince Royale
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- Prince Michael’s Pure
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- Sangre
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- The Force
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- The Foreplay
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- The Gentleman
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- The Thriller
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- Thug Passion
Sorry about this, but please just give security your I.D. – we don’t want no trouble.
Okay now that you’re in, Look our Bar Room. :silly: :cheerful: Annie Decorated it and I think she’s done a FABULOUS job!!!!! Thanks Annie!!!!
After, if you are still walking, talking and coherent you might want to stop by our gift shop!!!!
N O W S E R V I N G :
Hey there handsome, excuse me for a minute I’ll be right with ya’ 
MENU LIST:
N E W ON THE M E N U!:
DDD, also served by the bottle
Dirty Dirty Dirty Diana
INTRODUCING The dirty, Dirty, DIRTY DIANA: Some of you addicts have been pretending. And it’s really not necessary. When you come into the bar, have a seat. Your drink has already been prepared. We’ll even serve you the bottle. After all, it’s got your name on it. :yes: :alien:
Warning: Do NOT Mix this drink with Bad Boy Shots. We’ve heard some stories, let me tell ya!
Bad Boy Shot
THE BAD BOY SHOT: Let’s face it, you’re not a good girl and you’ve never been one. You need something strong in ya and this big, black bottle IS IT. One shot is usually enough though we at CCC already know that’s not all you want. Pure Testosterone, raw masculinity infused with some BAD a$$ attitude – all you need to do is open up, throw this one back and wait for it.
:pouty: :sick: Warning (Drink Responsibly)
MJ
- MJ, Too
MJ: We’ve taken this infusion of all natural MJ bodily extracts and perfectly blended it into this refreshingly, naturally sweet and tangy citrus beverage we all ooooooof course, MJ. And we swear, it taste just like JUICE! We can’t really explain what it will do to you — experience it for yourself. You’ll understand after your very first swallow. :whistle:
A Wet Sabah -- Creamy Sabah w/ just a hint of Michael in her.
A Wet Sabah: Creamy Sabah w/ just a hint of Michael in her.
In honor of our favorite couple’s special night we at CCC have created two special drinks:
CHASTITY and UNLEASHED
Ms. CHASTITY
MS. CHASTITY: Coy and uninhibited, sweet and sincere. Remember when you were without fear, honest and whole — do you want to feel like that little girl again; do you want to experience, if only for a moment, the blissfulness of youth? Enjoy, Saniia’s Ms. CHASTITY. Experience the quality that captured Michael’s heart. INNOCENCE IS INTOXICATING.
Unleashed
UNLEASHED: Years of discipline, control and abstinence can only result in one thing: UNLEASHED. We were there. We captured it. We bottled it. Taste the flavor of unbridled passion.
Liquid CobraCrack™
Liquid CobraCrack ™
LIQUID COBRACRACK™ There hasn’t been a chapter uploaded for days! Your internet connection is on the blitz and you can’t find your IPod. Your family and friends have completely disassociated themselves from you because you’ve become a walking zombie. Not one of them understands why you’ve been staring at the blank screen of your computer for days now. But if you don’t get some Michael in you and in you quick, you will just explode!
Due to the number of addicts jonesing outside of CCC we rolled up our sleeves and created this TEMPORARY infusion of Michael in the form of Liquid CobraCrack ™. Stock up now while supplies last. Keep some in the back of your fridge, in the garage, under your desk at work and in your nightstand. Never be without Michael again!!! But Be Warned: Liquid CobraCrack ™ is equally as addictive as the real thing and there is a high likelihood of developing a tolerance very quickly. :sad: You really just can’t replace the real thing!!!!
The cool, refreshing boyish joy of Michael in your glass.
MINTY MIKE: Inspired by Sonia: We were just goofing off, experimenting when we took Michael’s cool smile, his refreshingly sincere good nature, his boyish charm and added just a dash of delight and to our surprise, POOF!!! A Minty Mike appeared! One sip and we couldn’t stop laughing!!! Almost scientifically identical to the chemical compound of JOY, this drink will chase away any and all of your blues and put a peppermint — permanent smile on your face. Enjoy!
Creamy Sabah
CREAMY SABAH: Creamy Chocolate Mike w/ just a hint of Sabah. We searched high and low for a non-x-rated picture that we could put up and this is what we came up with — WHEWWWW!!!!
Pure
Prince Michael’s PURE – Cool, Sweet and light as mist, this magical drink refreshingly satisfies your craving for Prince Michael without the calories or the alcohol. Passion distilled to its purest form, PURE WILL cure your thirst . . . but alas not your desire. Feel free to drink it all day and all night but be warned, Prince Michael always leaves you wanting more.
:wub: L.O.V.E.:When it comes to shots, we don’t offer anything that is more electrifying. We are serving the pure essence of Michael. It IS all that he had ever stood for and nothing more. People who met him basked in its warmth. It was in his words, his actions, his demeanor, his behavior and most of all, his smile. He simply exuded it from his pores. He gave and never asked for anything in return and now we offer the same to you.
If you’re feeling down and you need a pick me up; if you have been hit with a dose of negativity and need something to chase it away, we present to you something that will fill you with only the most natural of highs. It is ten times stronger than any of our other drinks and lasts twice as long: L.O.V.E. Have a shot today and experience the love of Michael Jackson. ***If you experience an immediate sense of peace, joy and contentment, don’t be alarmed that’s the magic of Michael in your system.
Chocolate Covered Mike
CHOCOLATE COVERED MIKE: For those of us with a sweet tooth introducing, Chocolate covered Mike. It’s decadently sweet, addictive, satisfying and unbelievably good for you. It’s just too perfect, OMG!!!!
- Sangre
SANGRE: Other establishments serve Sangria. We serve Sangre. Simply put, this sensually, seductive mixture of perfectly blended fruit, aged wine and just a tinsy weensy drop of Michael’s blood will invade your system and change your personality FOREVER. Undercover cameras captured the woman in the picture above seconds after she took one sip – we are not even sure she had a chance to swallow. Michael NEVER knew what hit him but I hear he was smiling for days afterward. Try it – if you’re woman enough. :devil:
The Force - it has a lot of power!
THE FORCE: This drink is served with a resuscitation kit. I don’t’ think I need to say more!
The Prince Royale
THE PRINCE ROYALE: You’re a lady, and you know truthfully that is the only kind of woman who can capture Michael’s heart. You only drink to relax, not to get drunk like some of the lesser women who frequent Da Smooth Criminal. You’re not interested in cheap sex, you want a life time commitment from the object of your affection. Your drink will be served in our finest crystal, the ones etched in gold, on a silver platter in the VIP section of the bar. The smooth and fruity undertones of this vintage wine will peel away the layers of your resistance until you are as free from your inhibitions as any Creamy Mike lover. The only difference is you’ve done it with style. The price of this drink only reflects your superior self-worth. Go ahead splurge. You’re worth it! And Michael will definitely take notice. He enjoys the finer things in life and so do you.
Thug Passion
THUG PASSION: Okay it’s no Michael but you’re strapped for cash. The flavor doesn’t last as long but it’s just a ‘lil something to keep you going until you can get a REAL drink. A favorite of our financially challenged customers. What you see is what you get and damn, come on girls, you have to admit, it looks good as hell.
THE MABHA * Michael chose the name so excuse the spelling : )
THE MABHA: A smooth and tangy combination of Sabah and Michael with a twist and zesty kick at the end. Don’t nurse it, ’cause it get’s flat. Drink it while it still has that sizzle!
THE GENTLEMAN
THE GENTLEMAN WILL stay in you all night and will also be the first thing you feel when you wake up in the morning. Now let’s be clear: It’s not a hangover. It’s better than a hangover. It’s a HANG ON I’M CUMIN’.
Cool, milky, deceptively sweet.
THE MIKEGASM: Hands down, our most popular drink! Cool, Milky and deceptively sweet, you won’t see where the bang is coming from but IT WILL hit ya!!!!! What’s worst, you’ll keep ordering it anyway. We can’t explain why it explodes in your mouth, we just know we like it!!!! Make sure you have a designated driver if you start throwing back this one. We’re not going to take responsibility and you WON’T have just one.
Mr. M, Home Brewed Right Here at CCC daily!
MR. M: This is our signature beer. We brew it on the premises but if you’re watching yourself, you can get our light version instead.
Mrs. M, For Our Lady Cowgirls who WANNA remember the good times!
MRS. M: The light version of our homemade brew, for our responsible drinkers who also want to make it home in one piece.
Holoma's Soup
HOLOMA’S SOUP: This deceptively potent drink has babies popping up all over the place and since Michael loves da kids, we just can’t take it off the menu. It’s spicy and fruity and served with a strangely cool mist circling up top. Don’t mind the woman in the back hovering over the cauldron. She mixes a big batch of it every morning and though we’ve never asked for a specific list of ingredients, she says that it’s all natural and we trust her!!!
Creamy Mike
Creamy Mike w/ Extra Creme
CREAMY MIKE: (Inspired by Annie) Pure milk chocolate, lightened to perfection with thick, heavy cream and a blend of exotic liqueurs, the taste of this drink will linger in your mouth for hours. You’ll find yourself constantly licking your lips and thinking about it even after you’ve cleaned the last drop out of the glass with your finger. So delicious we naturally prepare two when it’s ordered because everyone gulps them down so quickly. BE WARNED: This drink WILL give you a particularly wicked alcoholic sugar rush. A number of women find it very difficult to keep their legs closed even after one small sip.
The Foreplay
THE FOREPLAY: (Inspired by Martinigirl) Trust me. Looks CAN be deceiving. This seemingly happy go lucky drink will put you flat on your back and keep you there. No matter what you’ve heard YOU ARE NOT READY for this drink. The tangy taste of pineapples smothered in Amaretto and Southern Comfort will knock you right off your feet – literally. Once on your back, you WILL stay there for days . . . and nights. I took this off the menu because I lost a couplah return customers. It’s served with a life size cut out of the Michael pic above. A bunch of people ordered, left and were never seen again.
Golden Boy
THE GOLDEN BOY: (Inspired by Enola) From the moment this Martini came into existence we knew it was special. Inexplicably sliding down your throat like icy cold molten lava, we struggled to formulate an adequate description. Fearing, because the drink was so powerful, that we would face multiple law suits if we put this volatile concoction on our menu we decided in the end it would only be safe to offer ONE drink PER PERSON per LIFE TIME. Ladies, ladies, before you protest, please try and understand: The Martini . . . shakes/stirs itself! (Cue dramatic music) ( O-O )
The Thriller
THE THRILLER — (Inspired by MJQuan) It sizzles, it pops, it dances in your mouth and then it gets down in you and makes you wanna dance, too. One sip, and your hand is up in the air, you’re pursing your lips and saying, “Oooooo”!!! This is our most popular non-alcoholic drink. You can take it all day and never get tired. Enjoy!
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"So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to thee." W. Shakespeare
(Spike to Buffy, Buffy the Vampire Slayer.)
"So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to thee." W. Shakespeare
"----->His intelligence is instinctual and emotional, like a child’s. If any artist loses that childlikeness, you lose a lot of creative juice. So Michael creates around himself a world that protects his creativity”. ~ Jane Fonda
Damn girl!!! I only got three down and they’re all empty!!! you win!!
Here’s your prize….*mixing Enola a Creamy Mike with Extra Extra Extra cream and a cherry on top*
oh what the hell, Sabine’s not here *serving Enola a Golden Boy too* she really can’t expect us to behave when noone’s tending bar (besides she owes me anyway)
that should put you in the recovery room :cheerful:
Enjoy!
YAY!!! I won!
Wow, that Creamy Mike sure looks delicious. Cherry and all….
Oh my…. a Golden Boy too?
*taking a sip of the Creamy Mike, licking cream off my lips*
Mmmmm nice…. So you think a Creamy Mike and a Golden Boy will put me in the Recovery Room?
I doubt it.
Oh, wait, I just had 5 L.O.V.E. shots too… or was it 7?
Whatever.
If I pass out, I know someone will drag me into the Recovery Room where Michael will be watching over me all night long. As always.
thanks for drinking with me today Enola *scooping up the whipped dream Enola spilled on the bar* and yes dear that was 7 shots…ummm you sure you should be drinking that Golden Boy so fast…i mean i know you’re hardcore but those are strong!
Enola….Enola…? *shaking Enola slumped over the bar*
*sigh* off to Recovery you go girl! *Grace wraps Enola’s arm around her shoulders and drags her to the RR*
There you go honey, Michael will tuck you in :happy:
oops! that should be whipped “cream” ….although “whipped dream” has a nice ring to it doesn’t it :blush:
*mumbling*
Zzzank you, Grazzziiieee…
It’zzzz been a pleazzzure.
ZZZZZzzZZZZ ZZzzzZZZZ
Sweet dreams poppet :kissing:
Hello?? Anybody here?
Sonia… still in RR? What a night, huh?
Enola… zZzzZz there now.
Gracie…?
http://goo.gl/uhbE
Nah!!….Right after I gave Michael a STRONG cup of black coffee you should have seen his face
:w00t: IT LOOKED LIKE THIS
He ran out of the room so fast I could see fire and smoke coming from his shoes.
:biggrin: But he was gentleman enough to stop turn around and say to me….HEY GIRL LETS DO IT AGAIN TONIGHT!!!
SO LADIES I’M BRINGING MICHAEL TO THE BAR AGAIN TONIGHT!!!
Sabine, have a line of L.O.V.E. shots lined up
LOL, Sonia, that is prescious!
Hey girls! Did you not see the new scent, I expected to come here and pass out from it!
HOw are we today. I hope full of love and inspiration. And plus, a new chapter is about to come out!
Michael would probably eat your dessert with gusto, even though he was blushing, and ask for seconds, Sonia, Sex in the pan, I remember that!
Sonia, just a word: solidarity! LOL
Sabine, what are we drinking? Where’s the cocktail master? You know when I first entered the new room I almost sprayed Halo into my mouth thinking it was a new drink? *smh*
Enola sure is full of love, literally because she’s been drinking shots as if there was no tomorrow…
:whistle:
Hey Girl!!!
I was JUST about to come and get you, do you have any idea how our “Bad, Cowboy” was acting up last night???
Michael promised me tonight he’ll behave himself….Lets see how it goes
:biggrin: As for the dessert. I remember the first time I gave it to my family, my mother was eating it and she was like “”Ooo…aaa…Oooo….aaa!!!” I was like only if you knew WHAT you were eating.
:wub: That’s why I wouldn’t tell Michael until he finished, I wouldn’t want to embarras him….he’s so shy
Well, how did it taste, the Halo? you know, you can use it as a breathe mint, too right? ;)
Today I think I will only drink The Thriller! I need energy, (to write) and I need a boost to my spirits!!!! I’d like to put up another chapter but unfortunately I keep getting distracted! Where’s my army of L.O.V.E. — stand by this door and don’t let anyone in until I finish this chapter!
Sonia, LOL, that’s so funny, if you only knew what you were eating.
Yeah, Michael was shy, but BUT he was also a little naughty inside too — I think he would have got a kick out of it. Did you see the new scent? I think you’ll love the description!
Oh by the way, we had a meeting about what you guys did to Bad Michael. He came and found me and complained bitterly. I was surprised when he mentioned your name Sonia!!!!! Shame on you!
Sonia, you could make this dessert for us!
Sabine, as I don’t know how to “picture” landscapes as Sonia – I have to learn, I swear! – I just rearranged the back of the bar, for you to write (if you need any drink, just shout! – LOL):
OOooooh, Annie, that is just perfect!!!! Sonia, I just saw your comment in the *squirt* *squirt* Just a moment, I’m spraying my new writing room so I can get rid of all of the negative energy *squiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrttt*
There, I just saw your comment about Halo! LOL! I want a picture of Michael with his legs wide open like that on my bedroom ceiling!
Now I need 15 shots of L.O.V.E., my laptop and a that GIF of Michael humping the floor!
WHO….MOI????
:whistle: Now what in the world did I do????
:angry: Oh Michael…you sneaky boy….going and complaining on me like that to Sabine
WELL, WELL….Now what am I going to do with you???
OH I know…
:devil: I’ll throw water balloons at him, LOL! That should teach him a lesson
OH YES, I did see the new scent, LOVE IT!
Michael was TO ME, a perfect balance of shyness, naughtiness, with the just the perfect touch of a gentleman ((MMM…why is this sounding like a bunch of ingredients for recipe???))).
Sounds like another drink to me Sonia :cheerful: ! But let me finish this chapter and I’ll see what I can do.
Annie
That room is soo BEAUTIFUL!! Oh girl…it isn’t too hard to picture beautiful things, just relax, close your eyes and let your imagination run wild!
:w00t: SABINE! You said SHAME ON ME? You want a picture of Michael with his legs wide open on your CEILING?? MY MY…IF only he knew, LOL!! He ran to you for help, little does he knew he went to the Queen Lioness and we are all just cubs LOL!!!
:biggrin: In that case, you better keep an oxygen tank nearby in your room, in case of shortness of breath.
YOOOOHOOOOO!
Where is everyone? :ninja:
*jumping over the bar counter*
Guess I’ll just help myself to a few L.O.V.E. shots. :heart:
New Chapter of TTWC,,,
wooooooooHOOOOOOOO baby come on!
LOL!!!! You sneak, waiting until everyone was in the reading room. Okay, you pour and I’ll drink. How’s that?
sabs… I am being a good girl… I censored myself
Martinigirl, Where, how, when? *downing another shot* I’m feeling so good today, give me another!!! When all else fails, I can do the LaToya and just play dumb!
let’s just drink up!
I am so bad… I always search for the goodies in the chapter before i read the whole thing…
:lol: I wonder what you’ll find. YOu always surprise me *downing another shot* What’s that, like number 21!!! Lucky No. 21, pour me another!
*whispering*
Sabine… not ceiling but floor…
Ok, off to read.
Oooooo Michael is so nasty! I love it! *sipping shot slowly and nodding my head up and down with Michael’s hips*
hehehe… I wanna be cold too!
LOL – Okay I am off to read the entire chapter now!
*runs into bar*
Somebody give me one of each quick!
I just tortured myself with a double dose of TTWC and CM….
In fact….give me two of each and spray me down outside with the hose.
*spraying Pinkfrosting with the hose connected to the L.O.V.E. shots* Oh no!!!!!!!
:heart: drinking *the gentleman* cheers to saniia and PM first night together!
:wub: now that ‘s done let’s start the ‘royal ride’
I need something a little strong.
Wondering if I should start with a Sangre or Mikegasm.
Oh hell, why not both :cool:
*Calling out to the back* Get the ambulance ready, MsJanice is mixing drinks! *smh*
Michael whispers: What’s wrong?
I whisper back to him: I keep tellin’ them and they don’t listen.
Michael: I had the same problem at my concerts.
Me: The drinking?
Michael: NOooo, the passing out.
Me: Ahhhh.
*giving each other knowing looks*
*Lifting and drink a shot of L.O.V.E. together*
Me: *smiling at Ms.Janice* Cheers!
Bgirl! Royal Ride? Hmmmm, *jotting that down in my notebook*
wow I am all over the place
*waving*
Hi Enola, MsJanice, Sabine, PinkFrosting (Love your avi), Bgirl, Sonia…
Big hello to my mirrored partner in crime… Annie… did ya find the room (maybe we should tell Sonia)
hehehe… Sabine said penetration… heheheh
Bawhahahahah
Ba..
HA!
Hey, a little mixing ain’t never hurt nobody. :smile:
*sneaking behind the bar for another hit*
Oh hey Martinigirl, how’s my favorite drunk?
I’m serving drinks tonight. What are you having?
Helloooo guuuurrrrlssss…
:wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub: :wub:
oh gosh help me..
everyday i am falling inlove more and more with michael..
Sabine.. Alll those pics and videos…….i die everytime i come in here.. Gosh how could a person be soo sexy, sweet, kind, caring, loving and much much moreee???
my heart breaks everytime i see his beautiful smile. why did he leave us sooo soon?? :(
Hey Annie!!!!!!!!!!1
*seeing doubles*
Lovin the new Avi
Are you drinking?
*downing another Mikegasm*
Cheers!
Elmira;
Girl, welcome to the club! *high five*
msjanice!!!!!;
I’m sorry for the smilies, I just came here from the new chapter and was all sighs.Yes, drinking, I am drunk with love…. now I need to match up a bit. I’ll have a Prince Royale *pouring another Mikegasm for the lady* but I think we need another drink, a stronger one and related to PM, for that upcoming night…
:blush:
((((((((Elmira))))))))
That’s why I love this place, we all share the same love for MJ (well some of us do)
Here’s a shot of L.O.V.E., this one’s on the house :heart:
Annie- How about “The Force”, is that strong enough for you?
Thank you ladies for the support.
I will love MJ till the day i DIE!
I love MJ fans. I believe we are one big family.
*cheers*
I love Michael!!!!! Come on everyone on the count of three:
I LOVE MICHAEL Yay!!!!!!! :wub: :heart: :wub:
hey MsJ… gimme a Foreplay of course… with a chaser of The Force… see if I can end it with a Creamy Mike!
I
MartiniGirl;
Did you find that room? And… did you find Sonia? Something tells me we’ll find them at the same time… And where’s “Bad Michael” that was here yesterday, in the Bar? Mmm…
msjanice;
Omg “The Force”, it’s got a lotta powah!
Do you like the avi? I love that photoshoot, so powerful, so sensual… SO MIKE! If I had to choose some “style” – I don’t wanna say appearance, maybe look, for I said before there wasn’t a lot of Michaels, there was only ONE despite his physic – I think I’d stick to this one.
Ok, Force for everybody!
hmmmmmm Force
Okay I really should go and read the chapter in its entirety – I am trying to save it for my train ride on Friday – but I don’t wanna…
Martinigirl- Here’s your Foreplay
Cheeres!!!!!!! Long live the KING! :silly:
*taking MartiniGirl’s hand and leading her to the PM room*
Come on, girl… you know you want to and no one can resist PM.
Martinigirl- Here’s your Foreplay
Cheers!!!!!!! Long live the KING! :silly:
Okay, girls you know how it goes, after a night of drinking and partying, off to breakfeast!
LOL! It’s 10:35 p.m., but so what. My kids are on their Spring Break and we’ve got cabin fever. Be back in a few *hurrying any throwing back two shots of L.O.V.E.*
*grinning like an idiot and waving wildly, as my kids drag me out the bar*
I LOVE YOU MICHAEL!!! Love you girls! Woooooohoooo!!!!! CobraCrackCentral!!!!